I've gotten pretty good at leaving things in the past, once they've been arrested in their proper place. Occasionally, I'll dredge something up to keep what I've learned from it active in my life.. mulling over it in search of its lessons buried within the folds of time. Looking back helps me remember where I've come from and know better where I'm going. But I know it ought not to be done often, as I'd prefer not to trip due to my inattention toward the road in front of me. That said, I looked over my shoulder this morning.

And found an old voice bleating a sob story, their own, of course. As I applied my impression of them to the meaning behind their words, I rolled my eyes in recognition of the same old story.. poor me, I'm so misunderstood, tinged with implication that they've done nothing wrong and that others are culpable. Had I not witnessed first hand, their responsibility for the hurt feelings some feel toward them, I'd have walked away with merely pity in my thoughts. But alas, it's just not that innocent, in spite of their sad words, dripping with eloquence. Maybe the better one gets at phrasing it, the better one gets at believing it. I left my two cents and pointed out the inconsistency, but I wasted my time there, as they are likely to apply their impression of me to the meaning of my words and devalue them to suit their needs in the moment. Life is funny, isn't it?

Misunderstood.. Aren't we all. We are such an inconsistent race. A constant contradiction, reshaping with every unique instance - and they're all unique. We'd give the clothes off our backs to help someone we've come to know and deem worthy of our sacrifice, yet turn a blind eye to a hurting innocent child we've never seen; a Vietnam Veteran standing on the side of the road with a sign. I'd give twenty dollars I can't afford to someone who has touched my life, but haven't gone to the unicef site with that same twenty dollars to give it to someone likely even more in need. And I wouldn't know about them, but for this damning technology that has gripped the world without so much as a whimper in protest. We talk of independence, yet see what isolationism has wrought on the world (even if we pretend not to know the true culprit). We talk of moving forward, yet here I am, stepping backward for a moment, after issuing a well-worded disclaimer that makes it okay to do so. We talk of the world needing more personal accountability, but implement laws that rob us of exactly that. What is personal about a corporation that enjoys by court of law the privelges and rights of an individual person without the responsibility and accountability that we, as individuals have? We promote a lifestyle that requires no accountability. What can you expect from words on a page? We advertise an insistence on individuality in a world where we're all the same, coupled with indifference to others' opinions, despite that the world is our mirror; our benchmark, if you will.

If you bark at the world and the world barks back - you're a dog.

I started off rolling my eyes at a sob story that lacks a few shards of truth (which sullies the entire story and person writing it) and find my thoughts turned toward something much bigger. Well, the nice thing is that each of us have our excuses all lined up in orderly fashion to account for our part (or lack thereof) in it all.

Even escapism; moving to a remote location has a down side in terms of accountability. But perhaps I can kid myself that I'm leading by example.